Those before us
This is the talk given by Todd Burns at Decoration, May 2022
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I have been coming to Heflin since I can remember. So many things in my life have changed over the years, but this is one tradition that has remained remarkably consistent. One of the things I have noticed over the years is a reverence for certain people buried here. Those include my great, great, great grandparents, Colonial Simon Pierce Burns and his wife Sarah. I believe part of this is because of the history involved, including the fact that they were some of the first generations buried in this sacred ground. Many of you here also have multiple generations of family buried at Heflin, so you can understand the attachment to the cemetery and the allure of teaching our children and grandchildren about the history of our family and the history of this land.
Today, I would like to briefly talk about someone that is buried here that is so important to me that I must visit him each time I am here, either for decoration, when I come to see my son ,or check on the cemetery in general. His name was William Burns, but we all called him Bill, Billy or uncle Bill. He was special, not just because he had Down Syndrome, but for more profound reasons. Why am I talking to you about my uncle today and why should I speak about him when there are so many other wonderful people that are buried below us? Well, I guess the reason is that his influence and memory are something I can’t shake and need to share. My earliest memories of Heflin always include Bill. We were inseparable because when I was with Bill, I was the most important person in the world. He was focused on me. I am sure my cousins and brother felt the same way. He played the games I wanted to play, he did what I wanted to do, and as a kid, he was the coolest adult and uncle in the world….sorry Uncle Paul.
Bill Burns and pup
I know that each and every one of you learned from someone buried before us. Please let me share with you my lessons as a boy from Billy and afterwords, maybe you can share with me some lessons from someone you knew that is resting here. I would like that.
Lessons from Bill:
1) I never heard Bill say a negative thing about another person. I may, in aggravation, have pointed out some faults in other family members now and then as a child, almost certainly justified. Bill did not play that game. He talked about what he loved in those around him and seemed oblivious to any faults. I have tried to learn that lesson, but I have not always been successful. It is not Bill’s fault, he showed me the proper path and I can sometimes see his face when I judge others harshly. Sorry Bill, I am still trying.
2) Billy always had time for others. No matter what he was doing, he would take time for others. He never got mad at me and I was even more annoying as a kid than I can be now, if my wife and daughters can believe that. OK, so I might be giving Bill a little too much credit here. I forgot to mention his one fixation. All of this time for other people’s stuff was null and void if the Cowboys or UT were playing football. I learned not to bother Bill when a game was on, not because he would say something, but because even as a boy I knew I should not.
3) Bill was a creature of habit and order. When you opened his sock and underwear drawer, everything was perfect. I mean perfect, a Marine Core drill sergeant would have been silenced. Sadly, I never learned this lesson from Bill, but I always admired him for it. Maybe I’ll do better in the future, Bill.
4) Bill was loved. He was loved by his mother and father, his aunts, brothers, sister, nephews, nieces, and by so many of you sitting here today. He was liked by every person I ever saw him come into contact with. I am sure there were those that picked on Bill and even disliked him for who he was, but I never witnessed this. I would guess that my dad, uncle, and aunt witnessed this as kids. I pity these people because they were lesser people than Bill. I also know that Bill did not hold it against them. They just did not know better. One reason Bill was such a wonderful person was that he had an advantage over most people with his condition. He was raised by an extended family that loved him, believed in him, and supported him. There is a lesson in that as well.
Todd and Bill hanging out with a couple of canine friends
In my mind, Mathew 5.5 describes Bill when it says “ Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.”
I am amazed by how much I think about Bill after all these years. He continues to be a moral compass in my life, that I can never fully follow. In some ways, things were less complicated in life for Bill and that gave him a power that we can’t all possess. He was like all of us, with faults and with strengths. I miss him, but I don’t need him as I did when I was a child, uncertain of myself and my direction. Some of the smartest people I encounter do not understand things that Bill understood. When I visit with Bill in this place along with my grandmother, grandfather, my son and others, I am reminded that I am who I am on some level because of them. With all my faults, fears and reservations, I am a better person because of them. I hope that someday, when I am laid to rest at Heflin, someone will remember me and feel that I helped them in some way and maybe, just maybe, I had the positive influence on them that my Uncle Bill and all these other wonderful people had on my life.
When this service is over and your bellies are full, take one more moment to walk among those that have passed before us, for they are as much a part of your lives as those sitting here today. Thank you for coming to Heflin today and honoring those that have passed before us. Let us never forget where we came from, and who raised us up to face our lives with strength and dignity.
